It’s 9 PM. You’ve had a long, draining day at work. You collapse onto the sofa, and a critical choice presents itself.
On one hand, there’s your phone, glowing with the promise of a mindless, easy escape into an infinite scroll of social media. On the other hand, resting on the coffee table, is the book you’ve been meaning to read, a gateway to a world of new ideas.
This small, mundane moment feels insignificant. But it is not. It is a ballot box.
Choosing the phone is a vote for the person who is tired, distracted, and seeks passive consumption. Choosing the book is a vote for the person who is curious, growing, and values learning. Which candidate will you elect tonight?
We often think of lasting change as the result of a single, heroic decision or a monumental burst of willpower. This is a mistake. True, lasting change is not a revolution; it is a quiet, patient election, held every single day. The person you become in the future is decided by the thousands of tiny “votes” you cast with your actions today.
The Daily Election for Your Identity
As I explore in my book, A Symphony of One, every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become . This powerful metaphor completely reframes the process of self-improvement. It’s no longer about a desperate, all-or-nothing struggle. It’s about the simple, manageable process of winning a majority.
You don’t need a unanimous victory. You will have days where you cast votes for your old habits. That’s okay. The goal is simply to end each day having cast one more vote for your desired self than for your old self. Over time, these votes accumulate. They become evidence. And this body of evidence is what ultimately changes your beliefs about who you are.
But before you can win an election, you need a clear strategy.
Step 1: Define Your Candidate (Who Are You Electing?)
You cannot vote effectively if you don’t know who is on the ballot. Vague goals like “I want to be better” are useless because they don’t give you a clear candidate to vote for. The first step is to define your desired identity with absolute clarity.
Move from a vague outcome to a specific identity statement:
- Instead of: “I want to get in shape.” Your Candidate is: “I am the type of person who moves their body every day.”
- Instead of: “I want to be more mindful.” Your Candidate is: “I am the type of person who prioritizes calm and quiet reflection.”
- Instead of: “I want to write a book.” Your Candidate is: “I am a writer.”
Your Action: Take two minutes right now. Choose one area of your life you want to improve, and write down your “candidate identity” in a simple “I am…” statement. This is the person you are voting for this week.
Step 2: Design the Ballot (What Does a “Vote” Look Like?)
Now that you have your candidate, you must define what a “vote” actually looks like. The key is to make your votes incredibly small and easy to cast. Grand ambitions lead to inaction; tiny actions lead to transformation.
If your candidate is “I am a writer,” a vote is not “write a chapter.”
- A vote is: “Write one sentence.”
- A vote is: “Open my notebook.”
- A vote is: “Jot down one idea.”
If your candidate is “I am a present parent,” a vote is not “be the perfect parent.”
- A vote is: “Put my phone in a drawer from 6 PM to 8 PM.”
- A vote is: “Ask my child one open-ended question about their day and truly listen.”
- A vote is: “Make eye contact when they are talking to me.”
Your Action: Look at your candidate identity. Now, list 3-5 ridiculously small, undeniable actions that would count as a vote for that person. These are your ballots.
Step 3: Stuff the Ballot Box (How to Win the Election)
Now you need a system to ensure you cast your votes consistently. We can use a simple framework to make the process almost effortless.
- Make the Vote Obvious: Your environment should be a constant reminder of the election. If you want to vote for “I am a reader,” leave a book on your pillow. If you want to vote for “I am a healthy eater,” put a bowl of fruit on your counter. Design your world to nudge you toward your desired actions.
- Make the Vote Easy: Use the Two-Minute Rule. Any new vote you want to cast should take less than two minutes to perform. A vote for “I am someone who meditates” isn’t a 30-minute session; it’s “Sit and breathe for 60 seconds.” A vote for “I am a tidy person” isn’t “Clean the whole house”; it’s “Put one dish in the dishwasher.”
- Make the Vote Satisfying: Your brain needs immediate proof that your vote was counted. The best way to do this is to track your wins. Get a simple calendar and put an “X” on every day you cast at least one vote for your new identity. Or, keep a jar and put a paperclip in it for every vote you cast. This visual proof of your progress is incredibly motivating and makes you want to keep voting.
From Casting Votes to Becoming the Candidate
Here is where the magic happens. In the beginning, casting each vote takes conscious effort. You are a voter, deliberately choosing a candidate.
But as the votes accumulate and your “Evidence Journal” or calendar fills up with wins, your self-perception begins to shift. You are no longer just voting for the candidate; you are becoming the candidate.
The internal friction disappears. The struggle of willpower fades away.
- It’s no longer a battle of, “Ugh, I have to go for a run.”
- It becomes a simple act of identity: “I am a runner. This is what runners do.”
Your actions have provided enough evidence to change your core belief about who you are. You have won the election.
This is the most sustainable path to lasting change. It’s not about one heroic act of willpower; it’s about a thousand tiny votes that accumulate to build a new mandate for your life. The first step is to become aware of these daily choices, a skill I explore in depth in my book, The Observation Effect. By learning to see the ballot boxes in your daily life, you empower yourself to start casting the votes that matter.
